Songs and poems
1) I KNEW!
She was...
unready for me,
yet ready to see
if I...
could live out her dream
though as hard as it seems
But I
knew not of her plan
knew not of the man
who I...
born son of his name
it was cold how his name
By her...
sent a chill up my spine
how he left us behind
She cried...
So I hated his name
But I knew not the game
she played....
Double crossed him on love
caught wit a thug
this world
Never seen who I am
From a boy into a man
by Darrell Lomax, aka ELEMENT
2) From a God to a thug
Dear God here’s some words from that spirit you left,
soulfully trapped in the flesh, sewed to me black is my flesh.
With every breath I breathe I heed that you don’t give a fuck,
blessed everybody but us.
And what up with all this after my death, I’m getting judged,
You see if after my death I’m still a thug;
In your eyes, you really don’t give a fuck,
that I’m a product of sex humping with lust.
I adjusted to life in motion as is,
I’m supposed to be focussing,
on how to twist me a chance or a break,
to hustle happiness so I can escape.
The mind state by design that’s summed up,
from me you getting love and respect or nothing, but
enough room to keep travelling by,
I keep position on everybody alive.
I recognize human error is trusting without proof,
so dam what you say, I’m a watch what the fuck you do!
And be through with the stressing hope,
are you a mutha-fucking friend or a foe?!
It’s nothing personal, but maybe it is,
I’ve been betrayed by some family and friends,
I never trespassed, theft their love or betrayed trust,
but now it’s out of sight out of mind, And that’s fucked up!
To be a student taught lessons on blood thicker than water,
and then abandoned while you facing a slaughter.
I o ughta fuck love, chase my pleasure and be about me,
and never let you in on what bother me.
Cause obviously, nobody cares until you erupt,
and somebody’s left fucked-up!
It’s just us, with never enough „care“ to give a fuck,
from over here to over there we’re all fucked up,
Holding in pain hushed on the past,
too numb to cry when we’re sad
and mad our memories are all black and gray,
surprised that we’re alive today.
Breathing in hope to our passion,
that somebody loves us to satisfaction, with-out us asking,
DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE, FROM GOD TO A THUG?
3) My life of understanding sprinkled before you in a poetic form.
Have you ever counted up the amount of your fears?
And weighed them up against your courage and it became clear,
That half of your disappointing discouragement has to be blamed on you
Concerning everything you don’t have is realities’ way o f servicing-u-truth
That if you are too afraid to attempt to try to succeed in life
Then you and only you can be blamed for the tears that water your eyes
So I advise our emotions communicates through physical acts.
In fact happiness is energy excited and alive
Motivated once we engage in the participation of a try.
And I won’t lie within us there is a battle between courage and fear
The altercation ceases the very moment we commit to a decision sincere
And becomes set out to do by way of communication or physical acts
Either to explain something to a point or succeed doing this over that
It’s time now to ask
Have you ever been exactly where you desire to be
Right there in position surrounded by the light of finality ?
And it’s all on you to initiate the interaction
Step up to the plate of opportunity and make things happen
Well I always try to make things happen and suggest that you do the same
Life feels like pain so hustling up happiness becomes reward of the game
So be sure to set out early, respecting and estimation of time
To be sure that you do what needs to be done within the schedule of time
Your mind should continue planning, a scenario I play myself,
Beware! Some will exclaim that over thinking isn’t good for your health
But I was taught “that failure to plan is planning to fail”
And I plan to water the fire of my desired burning hell!
With this I believe that knowledge is power and understanding liberates us
From those who plan to peer pressure us feat (???) to become worried as fuck
About what they think about how we go about feast and curiosities taste buds
I say continue on with your experimental treasure hunt proud like “WHAT?”
When I was young life was revealed maturely and people kept us moving fast
I was warned that if you couldn’t keep up, you’d get left behind last.
So I caught on quick, asked questions and to the answers I took heed tried to apply what I felt I understood and set out to succeed.
Knowing how much time it took getting from one place to another was wise I learned this young when I sought out to lay between a woman’s thighs
The formula worked
I used to meet her twice a week on her lunch break and play under her skirt
All I was asked and had to do was keep the secret
So I never allowed my tongue to speak the secret!
There I was a young teen and she was a full grown, my teacher
I even sexe d up the wife of a preacher, dude was too religious (to religious) to freak her
I learned a lot from women
Even bit and serve the apple to a man so we all addicted to sinning
What do I mean by “sinning?”
To me it’s not about hurting or backstabbing or skinning or grinning,
It’s about teammanship, playing by the rules we established focussed on winning
Do not mistake me we all have our way my way is for me not your law
I just lived through my experiences and seen what I saw
Did what had to be done
Minding my own business being reality’s son!
I was also taught that everybody has been raised in a different reality
Depending on their geographical location based on their parent’s salary
So this legitimizes the right to be different based on your upbringing
Cause we are the direct result of what caused the e ffect of our up brining
I grew up around people who shared the truth and it wasn’t always pretty,
However, very necessary to know so that by reality you didn’t get done shitty!
But getting down to the nitty gritty, the way you feel inside is real
And we must love ourselves enough to honestly address the way we feel
So I advise you to lead yourself by your faith so not to become swallowed
Up by a confusion bu t knowing what to do thus, becoming stagnated
Reach out and speak up, just do it and by success become congratulated!!
Who ever I have invited to be themselves before me has a friend for life
Because I understand how it feels to feel betrayed by people in our life
I’m a pain killer, soul healer my understanding is majestic
After all, we deserve to feel understood, appreciated, loved and respected!
Nothing here was exaggerated, I represent honesty’s policy
And though certain details ducked behind sentence structure it was for secret keeping purposes obviously!
I pledge my allegiance to the truth, that privacy is our right
And that once I vow to keep a secret, it shall never come to light.
For those I trust have become initiated worthy of my faith
And I don’t just entrust my confidence in anyone who comes my way.
People who are of your likeness at the souls core you can feel it deep within
We have only to trust in fate’s introduction that they will do us no sin.
I’ll protect my word with all my life, may the might of me go weak
If ever I betray my oath to protect our secrecy!!
Authors note:
I have trimmed a lot of leaves and branches from my socialization tree, so to rid away all those who have failed my confidence. I can no longer allow myself to be short changed my worthy of integrity. For those who have remained steadfast in their representation of what I would consider a loyal friend I will forever be at your service, for those who have fallen short having committed acts of betrayal I must move on away from your contaminated self!!
Forward forever, backwards never (if not to rescue a friend) I bid you my reader friend understanding in truth as it actually is is above the reality of how we see it, for our knowledge may not be found absolute our duty then would be to (as I suggest) we simply perceive the truth and enjoy it s experience!!
Sincerely, Darrell “Element” Lomax.
4) A day of reflection; “Teenage crust” part one.
Note: This girl was a friend who shared with me a crush that was oftentimes displayed with playfully ruff energy.
In my face she said she witnessed a blush
As she noticed my eye peering with lust.
At first she was flattered with my compliments raw
As I boldly admitted that I liked what I saw
But too quick did I what decency treasured
Dipping (inquiring) to deep asking her measures
My fast life corrupted the patience I had
With one motion of greed I grabbed on her ass
She stated her name and declared me a fool!
The gamble I took with no time to loose
She distance a step took in a breath
Grabbed on my neck and pulled to her chest
Head locked, but comfy, cuddled by grudge
Deep in the winter I warmed by her hug
Pleading with laughter, filled with joy
To a woman liked being slung like a toy
Teenage love has the strangest twist
Cause after all she gave me a kiss
Hugged me tight gave me a date
Admitted to me she liked spontaneous play
But something went wrong, her parents divorced
The break-up they had decharted our course
Now she’s a thought stored deep in my mind
To reminisce teenage love from time to time.
Remembering the crush once more; part two
In the face of my memory I picture the past
Enjoying her image till the vision surpass
The face becomes clear, her body attached
It’s time to reflect on what made us attract
The curve of her lips, the ones that I’ve kissed
Tongue sweet as sugar to a bitter man’s lips
The eye of her innocence looks on to stare
Letting me know that love lived there
The face of the frame that had to be named
To make sense of the beauty that drove me insane
Her walk and her strut, the curve of her butt
Where my touchy hands always stayed cuffed
The small size of her breast lumped from her chest
A pillow for me as I lay on to rest
Her whole body figure set my heartbeat to trigger
The presence of essence I’d always remember
A cuddle and hug warmed up my blood
In zero below I stayed warm from her love
We listen and talked and shared most of our thoughts
Revealing our truths risking no loss
No tears ever fell through weeping with joy
Happy as a child with a brand new toy
The years went on, our roads have split
We’ve traveled apart for life has a script
I do hope and pray we dearly unite
Granted reunion if only one night
I believe in my heart someday will come
When our lives will union solid as one
Until that day all I can say
Her life is a picture that won’t fade away